20160609

First, let me clarify the interplay between doubt and questioning. To “question” does not equate to “doubt”. Doubt is a litmus test; it either pushes us to sincere questions, or it forces us to choose an easier path of unbelief. Essentially the question is: "Is doubt necessary?" I propose that it is. Before I joined my church, I had much doubt.  I did a lot of research. I studied and checked out books at the library. I read books by those opposed to my church. I read the words of the prophets. I read those who obviously had an axe to grind. I sifted through the bias and sorted out the truth. Even while reading this literature, I joined my church. For a time after I joined my church, I did not question. I flowed along, blindly, if you will. I was content to float along. It was safe. The world became black and white; there was faith on one side and doubt on the other. There was no mingling of the two. When questions arose, I put them aside, or didn’t bother searching them. I became stagnant, and my faith felt empty. I have revisited many of those questions and found that even though answers may not be apparent, the questioning itself leads to inspiration and greater faith. Do I question at times whether God is there? Unequivocally yes - I would be lying if I said otherwise. Does this mean that I have no faith? Absolutely not - faith is hope in things we cannot see. I rely on my spiritual feelings to tell me what lies just beyond my eyes. I continue to get answers in many different ways: the spirit testifies, the fruits of good choices and right living, the knowledge in my heart and mind. I continue to search out my questions with a desire to understand, knowing that I may not always get answers right away, or at all. I rely on the many wonderful spiritual promptings from the Holy Ghost; confirmations of truth which I have had and continue to have. I may be tempted to generalize those who question as just not having enough faith. However, faith grows and is garnered by the very questions that hope to define and explain. Questioning with a sincere desire, bolsters certainty in a world of uncertainty. Therein is the key. If we have sincere desire to find answers, doubt and questions will lead us to greater faith. Ultimately, faith and doubt work together. They are opposing forces that are a necessity of mortal probation. Faith and doubt are much like good and evil, polar opposites that we interplay between while traveling through this necessary condition of mortality. We need good and evil in this life to help us choose, as we need faith and doubt. Ultimately faith and doubt will no longer be needed when this mortal probation is over. In the meantime, I am as the father who said to Christ in Mark 9:24; “…Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.”